Reaction Paper: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction Essay

AbstractIn his book ameliorate the Wounds of familiar Addiction write by Dr. Mark Laaser he gives us a glimpse into the life of those robed to sex. Mark Laaser set off to increase understanding of cozy addiction as a disease. He leads us to discover how informal addiction takes over the life of the informally addicted person and arrests demolition from a Christian hu bit beings view. In his book Dr. Laaser examines what he calls the mental synthesis blocks behaviors that begin the troll that leads to intimate addiction, and the family dynamics that contri scarcelye to familiar addiction. The cozy addiction in the church building service is addressed along with how the church hobo recover.Healing the Wounds of Sexual AddictionHealing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction written by Dr. Mark Laaser (2004) analyses knowledgeable addiction from a Christian world view. Dr. Laaser (2004) is a recovering sex addict with personal experience of the disquiet and shame of sexual addiction. Sexual addiction is described as a sickness involving any type of uncontrollable sexual activity (Laaser, 2004). distant former(a) diseases, Christian sex addicts consider the added complication of non quest facilitate be energise they feel they will be hated, shunned, laughed at, or punished if anyone knew their delinquency (Laaser, 2004) however, as Laaser (2004, p. 224) say in his book while sexual fumble is devastating, at that place is hope for improve.SynopsisIn his book Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction Dr. Mark Laaser (2004) identifies sexual addiction, the cycle that causes it, and hope for those who argon sexually addicted. His theory of sexual addiction is that it is a disease and immoral. As with all sin, it escalates into a razeward spiral that if left untreated burn down cause death to the sinner. Laaser (2004) studys although sexual addiction is a sin it is excessively a disease. This leaves littledoubt for Dr. Laaser, that we argon enga ged in warfare when we attempt to heal sexual addiction (Laaser, 2004, p. 25). He believes the onset of sexual addiction consist of building block behaviors, these are sexual activities that cause the cycle of other sexual behaviors.Laaser (2004, p. 29) explains these building block behaviors are fantasy, pornography, and masturbation. These behaviors cause a cycle where the addict can never predominate satisfaction. In this cycle of sexual addiction, the addict tries to be in control but can non gain control without healing. As with most sins once caught in the cycle of sexual addiction it is impossible to get out without help. I believe that the church is responsible for helping to heal people who are sick. just as a person with diabetes or any other proceed disease the sexually addicted person needs a healer.Family dynamicsDr. Laaser (2004, p. 76) discusses the roots to sexual addiction, which he says begins in families that possess sunburned dynamics and characteristics. On e way families express un red-blooded dynamics are by means of boundaries. Boundaries can be too loose or too rigid. almost families may nurse both loose and rigid boundaries, which causes confusion in children.Rules are another force at work contributing to un effectual families. Dr. Laaser (2004) states some families have rules of conduct that save tension from getting out of control. These rules are probably never spoken or written down but the whole family knows them. Some of these rules are not talking around feelings, problems or embarrassing situations, this could be hiding ones feelings or denying problems (Laaser, 2004). The third category that contributes to unhealthy family dynamics are the roles people playact in the family unit. These roles can be unhealthy when a person is s expert into playing a role he was not created to play (Laaser, 2004). The terminal category is addictions, addictions can be substance or behavioral things that have become repetitive in an unmanageable way and lead to cataclysmic consequences.As a child I grew up in a family that had both loose and rigid boundaries concerning sex. I was told sex was something you do not do, besides that it was something you do not deliver of. I grew up not knowing what healthy boundaries were. This helps me to understand how a person could become sexually addicted. I know I could empathize with aperson who is sexually addicted. As a Christian I have learned what healthy boundaries are and what my role is as a person in Christ. I believe that sexual addiction is immoral, but it is also a disease. I also believe that an addict cannot get out of the cycle of sexual addiction without help. Therefore as the church we are to be the hand of Christ reaching out to help those who need healing from sexual addiction.Treatment of Sexual AddictionWhen seeing new patients Dr. Laaser (2004) asks three unearthly questions. The first question is do you want to get closely (pg.122)? He relates th is question to the invoice of the man at the pool of Bethesda, where Jesus asked the man do you want to get well. The correlation is that to get well the person mustiness want to get well. They must give up their past pain and suffering to God, and find alternative ways to find love and nurturing they need. This requires a lifetime of discovery, but it all starts with willingness (Laaser, 2004). The last 2 questions are what are you thirsty for (Laaser, 2004, p. 123) and are you willing to die to yourself (Laaser, 2004, p. 124). The addict must be ready to be healed, be thirsty for God, and be willing to die to themselves in allege to begin the healing process.Dr. Laasers treatment also involves ten components of accountability. Accountability is necessary in order for the addict to maintain sexual purity (Laaser, 2004). He relates the accountability to the story of Nehemiah rebuilding the city that has been destroyed. As in Nehemiah the addict must have someone to be accountabl e to.When the addict has agreed to treatment Dr. Laaser recommends there be a master in place to care for them. fit in to Laaser (2004) there are a growing number of Christian Counselors trained to give a formal diagnosis. The addict should be taken to this professional immediately to begin treatment.Dr. Laaser then gives five components of treatment of sexual addiction. These embroil stopping sexual behavior, stopping rituals, stopping fantasy, healing despair and healing shame. Elements of all five of these arerequired for an effective treatment computer programme (Laaser, 2004). I believe that learning never ends especially in regards to gentle behavior. I believe I have the empathy and positive regard for a person that has a sexual addiction to treat them. After works with addicts for a year I learned that this disease is habitual and that it is a cycle that is not easily broken. It takes patience and perseverance to work with an addict. roughly of all I believe it take co mpassion for that person. Knowing that retrieval is a lifelong process and takes a life time of work.Sexual Addiction and the ChurchA leadership Journal survey revealed that 23 percent of 300 pastors had done something sexually inappropriate with someone other than their spouse (Laaser, 2004,p.194). There are a variety of things that contribute to pastors sexual vulnerability. However it is still the responsibility of the pastor to get help and not act on these vulnerabilities. In order for the church to heal Laaser (2004) believes we must bring healing to two groups primary victims and secondary victims. Primary victims are those who have been sexually abused by leaders. Secondary victims are those in the congregation who were betrayed because of faith in the pastor. In caring for primary victims Dr. Laaser recommends that the church submit advocates who can guide these victims in the process of healing.The church should provide fellowship to the victims, and counseling. Care for secondary victims involves breaking the silence, the grieving process, reconciling the victims to the church, and prevention. taproom involves developing healthy boundaries in the congregation in order to prevent wounds. Dr. Laaser has several opinions in which I agree. One of the most important part of healing the church as a whole is to develop healthy boundaries in the church. This would prevent people from being wounded and wounding others.The church as a whole must heal the pastors and the congregation. Offering pastors help so that they do not become burdened by their job, and devising them be accountable to someone. I also agree that we must speak out and not hide any indiscretion in the church and when there is an incidence it should be brought out in the open. This would stop perpetrators from continuing to harm others.ConclusionThe addict is never completely cured from sexual addiction. It takes a lifetime of work and perseverance to break the patterns that cause a pers on to be sexually addicted. To recover from the trap of addiction a person has to come to the end of themselves and admit they need help. The shame and hero-worship from their habits make it hard for the addict to trust enough to seek help. Dr. Laaser stated accepting their powerlessness over their disease leaves them with a great humbleness and need for God, which is a deep aspect of their spiritual healing (p. 223). lengthinessLaaser, M.R. (2004). Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction. Grand Rapids, MI Zondervan.